WHEN CHILDREN BEAR CHILDREN, WHO WILL TRAIN WHO?

The move by some group of Legislators in the National Assembly to retain section 29(b) of the 1999 Constitution of The Federal  Republic of  Nigeria which succinctly states that “ Any woman who is married shall be deemed to be of full age “ has generated a floodgate of opinions  from Nigerians on various social platforms and print media.
Senator Yerima in his reply said he doesn’t mind giving out his daughter in marriage at the age of 9 or 13. A girl aged 9 should probably be in Primary 4 and I can imagine a girl at that tender age, being saddled with the arduous task of the home front when she should be primarily focused on her studies and watch cartoons at her leisure time. He also further stated that early marriage militates against prostitution, abortion, fornication and other vices. Then I ask how is early marriage an antidote to all these vices, I will like to educate him and his indoctrinated disciples on some of the  the consequences of early marriage;

1)      Inability to read or write- Majority of child wives who are predominantly from the educationally disadvantaged northern part of the country have never gone to school or left primary school because of their marriages, making them entirely dependent on  their husbands in all aspects of everyday life.

2)      Having many children early: This exposes the mother and her children to psychological and health complications.

3)      HIV/AIDS and other sexually  transmitted diseases(STD)-The overriding desire to be a good wife in the eyes of her family and the husband prevents the Child-Wife  from negotiating for safer sex practices; thus exposing her to the risk of acquiring HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases.

4)      Inability to plan or manage families- Because they are also children, the young and immature mothers cannot exercise a positive influence and control over their children, also proper nutritional, health care and household management practices would be lacking.

5)      The next generation of child wives- There would be a next generation of child wives who would by default follow precedents thus creating generations of child wives and unstable marriages borne out of the problem created by age difference and poor communication which would lead to early divorce or separation.

Out of fear of poverty associated with being single and the social stigma , Parents of child-wives compel their children to remain in loveless and violent marriages .

The question then is how would a child-wife experiencing all these not resort to fornication, prostitution, adultery and other vices which according to Mr Yerima will be curtailed by early marriage.

From my own personal view point on this issue I think we are barking up the right tree by ranting and venting over social media against this animalistic child bride issue but we have to appreciate the social dynamics responsible for this issue before there can be a possibility of ending this age-long practice. Religion and Culture always have a way of rearing their heads, like a Hydra over laws in every society. Religion and culture are two significant factors that form and shape the values of individuals in every society and women have always been at the receiving end of these cultural and religious practices in Nigeria today. Various ancient literary works have documented how women have always been relegated to subservient roles by the various cultures and traditions of various societies in the world. They were considered as wenches and were more or less regarded as tools of pleasure and service; and this is largely responsible for the slow upward mobility of the female gender in the gender class today. The perspective of a friend who surprisingly is a member of the Y generation really made me short of words, he went reeling out names of child brides like Anne Mowbray of Norfolk aged 9, the child-bride of Richard Shrewsbury who died in 1478 , Isabella Valois who got married at the age of 6 in 1396 and lastly Mary the mother of Jesus who bore Jesus at the age of 13 asking whether we should regard Joseph as a child molester.  It is not my intention to make this a religious discourse but for the purpose of clarification. According to the Bible at the age of 12  Mary was betrothed to Joseph when she became pregnant for Jesus through divine intervention  and that was why Joseph contemplated repudiating their agreement to marry (betrothal). We don’t have to give ancient examples for contemporary issues. The essence of history is to study past events and occurrences with the aim of solving future problems.

In July 2011 a woman was sentenced to ten lashes by whip for driving a car in the kingdom of Saudi Arabia and up till present day it is illegal for women to drive.
 In the Northern part of Nigeria women are mandated to wear face veils in a humid region where the temperature rarely goes below 38 degrees Celsius, nursing mothers also have to go the extra mile to back their babies under the veil.  In Igbo land women have little or no rights to inheritance. Our constitution only grants citizenship to any woman married to a Nigerian and not any man married to a Nigerian woman. The Patriarchal nature of Religion and culture has contributed to the indiscriminate treatment of women in the society. The western world has a long time ago departed from this age long practices due to their repugnancy while we still cling tightly to them.  The current predicament faced by women today in Nigeria has shown the flagrant disregard for International Acts and Conventions like the Child Rights Act and the Convention on Elimination and Discrimination against Women (CEDAW).   The dreaded militant sect in the North was set up primarily to fight against western education and influence; can we then say that this sect now has fifth columnists in the National Assembly who are blatantly in support of underage marriage which is anti-western?

Let us call a spade a spade and not a big spoon, marriage is a sexual union which requires a high level of maturity from parties to the union, and if a child becomes a party to this union with a man it is no longer a marriage but a paedophilial union.  When a child gives birth to a child, who trains who?

If great Women like, Okonjo Iweala, Grace Alele Williams, Margaret Ekpo, Oby Ezekwesili, Dora Akunyili , Diezani Allison-Madueke  and whole lot of other women were Child-Wives, would they be where they are today? We have to discard these age-long religious and cultural practices that have turned repugnant over time. If these practices and values have been fair why would women always have to be at the receiving end?  And lastly the emancipation and empowerment of the girl child should be the major discourse in the senate and not child marriage! Resources should be channeled to the empowerment of the girl child today!

Let us all say no to child marriage! God bless us all!